Friday, September 30, 2011

Happy times!

1. Ben made a 100% on the Nashville PD test!!! One phase closer to having him here full time! Finger's crossed it goes smoothly.

2. The weather here has be gorgeous!! I love Fall!

3. We leave in less than 9 hours for beautiful California to embark on a lovely stress-phone-work free cruise!

See y'all when they make us leave the ship...

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Our Journey

I promise not every post will be pregnancy related. I have so much to share and for the last 8 weeks only my poor husband, family and sweet close friends have been able to hear. I'm sure they're glad for a repreive...ha! I also want to remember everything and if my pregnancy brain continues the way it's going, I know I better write it down now!

We decided to keep our TTC journey mostly to ourselves. Ben is really reserved and well, a man, so he didn't really feel the need to make it public knowledge. If people asked him "when are you going to have kids" he'd respond "we're working on it" and leave it at that. For me, I wanted to reach out to my friends and SIL who have been there/done it. Ben didn't mind, but out of respect for him I did not post anything on FB or our blog.

Anyways....I know our journey is a cake walk compared to some, but it's still ours and I still want to document.

October, 2010: We officially started TTC. My Cardiologist informed me that due to my prognosis, I needed to start having my baby(ies) SOON. Talk about pressure.

We were going on B's birthday cruise and it just so happened to coincide with my "peak" time, so I just KNEW we would get pregnant. Knew it for a fact. I even had how we would announce to our parents planned all out and everything.

November 2010: Turns out, I don't know too much. It hit me hard too. Ben was supportive, but being the non-emotional thinker he is said " was only our first month." Yeah...he was right, but it still hurt. I went out and purchased a box of "ovulation predictor kits" and started using them to figure out for sure when the right time was.

I also started having pretty bad (and weird for me pains) in my lower left side. It lasted for a month, so I made an appointment with my NP at my OB's office. She did a u/s and some other tests and determined it was probably a pulled/strained muscle (too much Zumba I'm afraid). I was embarrassed that I wasted her time for that, but she was so sweet and reassured me it was good to be proactive about my health. Oh and I got a "no Zumba" pass for a few days, so that was great! :)

December 2010:
My hopes for a Christmas miracle were soon dashed. I purchased yet another OPK.
 My cyles started becoming spastic this month (21 days, 39 days, 27 days, 40 days etc etc).

January 2011:
No New Year's miracle either.

This month was AWFUL. My hormones were running amock. I was angry, sad and frankly downright bitchy to Ben. This month was a HUGE wake up call for me. I couldn't believe I was trying to make a baby with a guy I was treating like crap. I knew I couldn't continue like this and prayed for God to take over. Thankfully, He did! I also apologized to Ben. I still think he deserves a medal for putting up with me.

February 2011:
I was a peace and it felt wonderful. Ben and I were back to our old selves and it was great. I was attending Bible study, working on myself and we were both working on our relationship. I actually felt good about everything!

OPK and lots of prayers were used this month!!

March 2011:
Crazy cyle. 
Surprisingly, I was at peace this month when I found out that last month's efforts didn't pay off. I was getting prepared for my trip to the Mayo Clinic, so I really didn't have too much time to dwell on trying!

I did schlep my OPK's from Memphis to Minnesota though! This month I didn't actually get a "positive" on my OPK, which meant I didn't ovulate (using 2 OPK a day gets expensive, FYI!!). Which means, no luck trying this month.

April 2011:
Cycles were still crazy. No positive OPK again. Really close to giving up.

May 2011:

More of the same, except this time I called my OBGYN. She wanted me to come in for bloodwork. A few days later, the nurse called and said that my bloodwork appeared to be "normal", but Dr. W wanted me to come in to see her.

June 2011:
Cycle was crazy (talking 40 days)
Thankfully I was on CD 3 when I went into talk to Dr. W. Her tech  did another vaginal u/s and said everything seemed to be normal. Great. Why can't I have a black/white answer?? 

Dr. W came in, reviewed my history (I had all my cycles written down for her too) and then said "'re not regular, not getting positve OPK, and still after actively TTC for this long not's what we can do: since it hasn't been a full year yet but you're not ovulating every month, we can put you on Clomid which will help you Ovulate (or ovulate better). If you're not pregnant with in 3 months we'll do a sperm analysis on B and a HSG for you."

Ben asked her what the side affects of Clomid were and I should have recorded his reaction!! She said "there's a slight risk of twins....and it will make you have more extreme PMS". His face when she said the last part was priceless. Poor guy!

I started Clomid that week (CD 5-9) and boy was it fun...NOT. It made me an emotional wreck. I had to go to Goodyear for my A/C and went OFF on the guy at the counter. He was a jerk, but I don't normally get rude with people. I called Ben to get him to talk to the guy and then started crying. I was mortified.

Went back on CD 21 to get blood drawn to see if the Clomid worked. It DID work (my # was 19 which was good), but our efforts did not.

July 2011:

Took my second cycle of Clomid. Thankfully, I did NOT have the crazy hormone surge this time. Ben joked and asked me "any more victims today??"

I found out that several of our friends were expecting and to be honest I didn't know how to feel. Of course, I was happy for them, but I was also sad too.

I went in on CD 21 for the bloodwork. The nurse called a few days later and my results were EXCELLENT (35!)!! Not to get TMI on y'all, but everything was perfect this month and I just KNEW it was the month.

But, I was so busy getting ready to move, start my new job  etc I honestly didn't think too much about the whole baby thing.

July 28...4 days late...and finally a POSITIVE!

It was totally a God thing too! His timing is perfect! Ben and I were disucssing the logistics of having a baby....about how much time I could afford to take off  at my old job (they didn't take babies til 1 yo), who would watch him/her since our families lived so far away etc etc. Well.....God answered ALL my prayers! I not only got a positive, I got a new job where I can bring my baby with me, and we're close to our family! Thanks be to God!

1 Thess 5:16-18 (NIV)

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

I know it only took us 10 months (which is NOTHING compared to some), but it was one heck of a 10 month journey.  I am actually glad I had good friends/family to talk to about everything. Sometimes you just need someone who can relate.

I continue to pray for everyone who is still in their TTC journey. Don't give up hope....God's timing is perfect.

Monday, September 26, 2011

13 weeks....things are just Peachy!

I cannot believe I'm 13 weeks already! It is honestly going by so fast.  I'm trying to soak it all in and enjoy every second.

13 weeks (I had eaten prior, so I'm not "that" big!)
*How far along?: 13 weeks

*How big is your baby? The size of a Peach--3 inches long!

*Total weight gain?: 2llbs so far. (I just hope I don't gain 10 on our cruise next week!)

*Sex: We find out in November. It can't come soon enough.

*Maternity clothes: I purchased some maternity shorts for $3 at ON and LOVE them! So comfy. 
Other than that I'm wearing regular clothes. My pants are snug, but I either use the rubber band trick or a Bella Band.

*Stretch marks: None on my tummy yet...I'm using Palmer's. I did get two on my hips from where my hip bones used to stick out and now there's this necessary thing called fat!! Ugh.

*Sleep: Ok. I'm a stomach sleeper so it's been hard. I bought a Boppy Ulitmate pillow and it helps me lay on my side. I also have to get up to potty like 4 times every night which isn't fun. Oh and I have the craziest of dreams. REALLY crazy.

*Best moment this week: Hearing Minnow's  heartbeat! That sound is the best thing in the entire world. Also, sharing the big news!

*Movement: I could hear him/her move with the neat. Minnow did NOT want to be "poked" with that thing.

*Food cravings: Fruit Loops, pop tarts,  pineapples, Red Robin (I could eat there every day) and salty stuff

*Labor signs: No thank you!
*Belly button in or out: in

*What I miss:  having energy, it's slowly coming back. Oh and not having heartburn...I miss not having this awful thing.

*What I'm looking forward to: Relaxing with my husband on our cruise next week. It'll be Minnow's first of many I'm assuming.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Spilling the beans...

As soon as I found out, I wanted to share the great news with someone. The only problem, it wasn't even 6 AM yet and nobody was awake...ha! Plus, I obviously wanted to tell Ben first.

I've always planned how I was going to tell my spouse I was pregnant, ever since I watched the Full House episode where Becky told Jesse!! I was going to get baby back ribs, baby carrots and a few other things and have a great dinner with a surprise ending. Since we are 3 hours apart, dinner wasn't an option.

I called Ben as soon as I knew he'd  be awake. This is how our convo went:

Me: Hey....can you please get off tomorrow??
Ben: for what??
Me: I can't tell you, but it's very important
Ben: you know it's next to impossible to get off that last minute...
Me: tell your LT it's an emergency
Ben: what's going on....I'd have to tell him what it is.
Me: I can't tell you over the phone, but it's realllly important.
Ben: if I guess will you tell me
Me: Yeah...if I have too
Ben: are you....{pause}....PREGNANT???
Me: "YES!!"
Ben: ...{silence}oh WOW.... this is awesome Babe!!!!

He then shouted to the girls "Momma's're going to be big sisters!!" (I'm pretty sure they were thrilled!!)

 I also got him the "Dude you're going to be a Dad" book and gave it to him when he came up!

When he came up that weekend, we went ahead and told our parents. I decided to get them cute baby shirts that said "I love Grandma" (Target did not have one grandpa shirt which made me so mad!)! B's mom cried and his dad had the biggest smile on his face! My parents were thrilled and gave us huge hugs.

via google

It was my Brother's birthday so we gave him a baby shirt that said "My Uncle Rocks" (w/ guitar since he plays). He immediately said " got knocked up huh". Niiice Bubs, nice. He and my SIL were over the moon happy for us!!

I'm so glad we could spill the beans with our close friends and family. It was way too hard keeping it a secret even for a few hours!!

Friday, September 23, 2011


I moved back to Nashville on Friday July 22nd and started my new job on the 25th. I was working 12 hour days and under a pretty good amount of stress. I realized I was 3 days late, but chalked it up to the stress. I just really didn't want to test negative, again, for the 10th month in a row. I decided to test on Thursday (4 days late) morning, but wasn't getting my hopes up.

I woke up at the crack of dawn. Tested, immediately put a towel over the test and went back to bed. Well, my heart was beating so hard and I couldn't wait the three minutes. I said a quick prayer, went back to the bathroom and slowly uncovered the test.

Then....I saw the most amazing two lines!!

I then started freaking out, saying "oh my gosh" over and over and over!! I couldn't believe it was really happening.

On my way to work, I picked up a box of the digital tests just to be sure. I took one as soon as I got to work and it came back "pregnant" instantly! That's when it really hit me!! The next morning, I took the last one just because...ha!

 It took me 3 tests to convince myself that I really was pregnant!!! I think before the next one, I'm going to buy stock in First Response...ha!

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Positively Exciting News!!!

Ben and I are BEYOND EXCITED to finally announce that.......

Baby Fish at 7 weeks...8/15


Baby Fish is due April 2, 2012 and we cannot be any happier!!!

More details to come...

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Where were you....

I cannot believe it's been 10 years since that tragic day. I remember that day so vividly. I was in English class when we got message to go to the Gym for an assembly (or PA was down). There, we received the news and were all stunned into tears. I had to go to Mr. Fry's Chemistry class, but Chemistry was the last thing on the agenda. We watched the footage on a small TV and we all cried. My Uncle lives in NYC and my thoughts immediately went to him. Thankfully he was safe.

B was actually in Marine Corps boot camp. I can't even imagine how he must have felt getting the news, especially being 100's of miles away from loved ones.

I will never forget...

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Pretty is as Pretty does....

My Granny passed away on Saturday and the world lost the Prettiest of ladies.

Granny and Pa on their wedding day

meeting Will

Helping me on my wedding day

Mother's day 2011

I miss her more than words can describe, but I'm beyond thankful for all the wonderful memories.

I just hope I can be as Pretty as she is....